Friday, May 29, 2009
weather or not
A few days ago, I was in a real funk. It was one days where a step forward resulted in 4 steps back. And I took the emotional hit for it. It seemed that little had meaning to me and I am definitely a meanings girl.
Why was I even making things for my shop? What difference did it make? Yeah, I might make some money, but surely creating had to result in more than just money.
I talked to people. Spent time alone. Took some time off of working on anything. Took a nap. Nothing worked.
The dogs needed to go out for what seemed to be the thousandth time of the afternoon. I leashed them up and out we went. It was raining. I love a rainy day and knew I was in trouble when even that didn't shift my mood.
My dogs have gotten used to walking in the rain. Indy, the little fellow, is like a sponge. His soft blond hair gathers moisture the way my hardwood floors gather dust bunnies. Charlie, sleek and short haired, is like a duck, able to shake the water off.
We walked in the front yard. At one point, I stood under a sheltering tree as the dogs sniffed. I realized that it was raining pretty hard and yet we felt nothing of it. Just 18 inches forward and we would be in the thick of it.
Since I am neither sugar nor a witch, we stepped forward. It was communion. I relaxed my neck so that my face was straight up to gather the raindrops. I just stood there. My eyes closed and sometimes open. Feeling my clothes get wet and wetter. My skin cooled and I felt the water run in small rivers on my scalp.
Alive. I felt so alive. I stood there, 2 leashed dogs standing by my side, in the midst of a veritable green haven, trees surrounding us and wet grass and clover under our feet. The rain fell and my mood soared. The wetter I became, the happier I felt.
I had to run an errand later that day. I saw the recycling truck and guy on the road up ahead of me. I had to take this photo of the street and if you look up the hill, you can vaguely see his truck. I sat for a few moments and what I realized was that he and I were kindred spirits of a sort. He wasn't bothered by the rain. In fact, by his behavior you wouldn't know that it was raining.
This cloud was from my craft run today.
And this rainy night time shot is driving home just a little while ago. I love the way the colors just melt across the pavement. It always reminds me of Paris in the rain. Must have been from another life.
Thanks for the rain. Thanks for the connection. Thanks for the release. Thanks for the beauty and all the second chances.